Take A Look At These Clowns!

This page is truly unique.

You get to see Full Time Guido’s in action from Seaside Heights all the way up to the northern tip Of New Jersey looking like complete morons. You equally get to see Guidette’s that are 21 looking every bit of 31 from laying in the sun until their skin has dried itself into a leather belt.

We have scoured through pics from all along the Jersey Shore – Seaside Heights, Ortley Beach, Toms River, Point Pleasant Beach, Belmar, Manasquan, Long Branch, down a bit further to Long Beach Island and of coarse the Random Guido Pics that come in from Wildwood Beach.

We of coarse have the Garden State Parkway and the Turnpike which connects Jersey to Philadelphia and New York City so you have a Guido Bloodline Vein running right through the state as well. Throw in those Staten Island and Long Island Guidos and you have the makings for a parade of hilarious pictures. Enjoy The Freak Show!

The state of New Jersey is a great place with many characters but these Guido’s and Guidette’s are in a league of their own when it comes to being the laughing stock of the state. Enjoy the hilarious comments and you might even recognize somebody on here. It might even be you! That’s sad.

If you have some good Guido or Guidette pics be sure to send them to us and we’ll post them if they have what it takes to make this Wall Of Shame. Click Here to Send Us Some PIcs!

Remember to read what is written directly below this to truly experience a good laugh.

Place Mouse cursor over Pictures for additional info on these Hilarious Pics.

Place Mouse cursor over Pictures for additional info on these Hilarious Pics.

Place Mouse cursor over Pictures for additional info on these Hilarious Pics.

We Even Look Good Before We Run

Who the fuck wears hair gel before running a marathon. Apparently these two fucking douchebags.

The Seaside Heights Village People

Must anything be said other than utter embarrassment to the male species.

Underneath The Bronzer

Looks like this guy found his girlfriend at an Orange Glow convention. Bottom Line – he doesn’t look pleased. She sure as hell looks peachy though!

A Pic is worth a Thousand Shits!

Taking a pose right before he unloads in the toilet. You can see the pain in his lopsided crinkled pucker pose. He uploaded this to his facebook account and entitled it: “To all the Ladies – This pic was taken right after I did a Hershey Squirt in my pants and right before I clogged the bowl.”

Jack-o’-lantern Boy

This kid has guaranteed skin cancer by the time he completely turns gay. That might be tomorrow. He kind of looks like he’s turning into his own species: Like part Chinese, Ape, and Mannequin.

Sea Urchin Rat Boy

This kid looks like a pile of human feces. Notice the puffy bloated face, his bronzer actually sun baked to his ailing skin, and his oblique shaped pucker pose. This kids best chance of getting laid is in a fish tank with fellow blowfish.

I wear my Sunglasses at night and seek penis.

Drive by kissing. Beetlejuice Boy gets jack kissed on his way to do some “touch up” work to his bronzer. This is some scary shit. Instead of knocking this flamers fucking lights out, Beetlejuice boy poses for the camera. This is a sad day for all Fist Pumpers. Their homosexual ass pumping ways have been caught and exposed for the world to see. This is vomit……………….

This guy looks so beat and washed up that you kind of feel sorry for his existence. Easily 41 years old and trying to pass as a 20 something year old Fist Pumping Guido. He’s got so many things going wrong you can write a fucking book. He’s got colored contacts, Grey Hair, A Brook Hair Cut, Mounds Of Bronzer, Sweat protruding from his pores, and an expression that says: “It’s starting to become a full time job trying to pull this crap off. I think it may be time to retire the act. I think I feel one of my Kidney Stones acting up.” Once again, anything to stay young and try to fit in. This guy is up for Royal Putz Bag Douche Bag Of The Year Award already in early 2009. Keep up the good work Fist Pumpers. Your giving us plenty of material here!

Ladies And Gentlemen: The Bug Eyed Mutant Bronzer Fag. He is too gay for a full synopsis of this pic. His pose tells the story of a young kid gone wannabe gone bad. Enough Said! The pic speaks Volumes!

What this pic proves is: Rich Indian wannabe Guido’s with Porcupine hair can buy themselves a nice little cheap kiss on the cheek if they buy a white girl free drinks all night. Immediately following this picture the girl ran to the bathroom and vomited up remnants of streaking globs of gel that ended up staining his disgusting long drawn out face. This guy is a Royal Putz bag. I don’t want to see his ugly face again. His nose is a mile long and completely disfigured. It suits his ugliness just fine. Enjoy him one last time for a good mock in the next pic and then get him out of your mind.

You can see the fear in this queer’s eyes. He knows this pic will come back to haunt him and it of coarse has. What was he thinking? Enough said. The girls seem to be mocking him as well. Their like “Wow, let’s take a pick with that Douchebag for a good laugh!” He obliged thinking his wiener might get touched. It of coarse did not. He went home and spanked off to a Porcupine.

Where are the people, where is even the slightest attention, and where is his right leg? This guy is the epitome of a loner Fist Pumper. After garbage has been thrown at him and the party is long over, he continues to find some kind of inner enjoyment dancing by himself. Pinch Yourself. Yes your alive. Give thanks that you are not him.

Look at our friend Joey – He spends 4 hours a days in the gym, doesn’t eat any enjoyable foods so he can maintain his physique and he played the trumpet in our high school band. Oh shit, we weren’t supposed to tell you that last part. Bottom Line: Loser trying to recreate himself by blending into the Guido Scene. Starvation, Needles, Bronzer, Wife Beater, Hair Gel – YOUR IN! Girls in the scene will sleep with you. Easy advertisement for Tool Box males with Pea Brains and Zero Intellect.

This guy used to drive an Iroc Z and get laid big time back in 1982. 26 years later and 60 pounds of blubber later – he has the nerve to wear a speedo and a cross 30 times bigger than his Johnson. He’s got some problems but the Surf Club would make a nice summer home for him.

Other people are taking notice of the Bronzer phenom and realize they can just blend in naturally. 3 Black men can now pass as Bronzed up Italians. And I’m also noticing a slight “Pucker Up” pose. Scary!

IT’S OFFICIAL: An Asian Guido doing the “Pucker Up” pose and wearing face Bronzer. Wow, look at all the girls in the car. Not one. This defines a gay Sausage Fest.

A Big Thanks To Dianna for digging up the following National Treasure Guido Pic – good work – these guys are total tool bags! People need to see this stuff!

Any man who wears a shirt telling the world that “He loves His Penis” is most definitely not getting Laid. Enough Said. What a Royal Douche Bag! And His friend is far from a “Fucking Rockstar.” He’s a fucking Cockstar at best and damn is that pathetic. These two are the definition for Mutant Losers! Also check out the slight arm flex with all 13″ of his womanly biceps.

Woman becoming Alien and Man becoming Woman. It’s a crazy ass world out there my friends.

It’s A Guido Christmas

I knew the Pine Needles served a dual purpose for Lee Hottie and His Gang. When they need some extra hard spikes in their Brook they just super glue the shit to their greasy bronzed heads. This pose is certainly extra extra gay even for this site. On The First Day Of Christmas my true love gave to me a whole jar of Bronzer Brown Cream.

Move Over More Hilarious Pics and a Dubious “Douche Bag Award” Being Presented To:

The One & Only “BeetleJuice Boy.” Once again holding on to that one bottle of grey goose for dear life. He is very proud of that purchase. I’m telling you – delivering Pizza can afford some of the finer things in life. You just have to milk them out for a while cause cash is a premium. Just enough money to buy hair gel, go tanning & convince yet another young girl that he’s a true “Player” in the Club World.

This Guy Is Blatantly Irritating To Look At. He looks like his name should just be “Diarrhea Boy.”

100% Hindu – Wearing The White Suit – & Mixing it Up with Dumb Guidettes. Life couldn’t be better for Gandhi’s Lost Son.

It must be fun starving yourself and depriving yourself all year long of all the delicious foods available to feed your stomach to take this one yearly gay pose. Wow, you mean under belly fat there’s muscles? That’s news to Science. Eat a Fucking Cheeseburger you Fucking Homo’s.

A Big Thanks to Ken from Philly for Submitting These Ultra Ridiculous Pics that are down below. We added the Beetlejuice pic! Continue submitting us pics and we’ll continue to post the good one’s and make fun of these freaks to the fullest extent of the Anti Guido Law! You send the pics and we’ll do the trash talking and say all the things you want to say to these Douche Bags. Simple Formula! Continue to send in the pics!

JF

Meet “Guatemalan Boy” & His Sidekick “Turkey Face”

Real Guido = Italian, Meet Guatemalan Boy and Polish Boy. Take some advice from Burnt Boy down below and get a little browner. Then maybe you can pass for partially Italian. Until then – Stay out of our Face you fags! Go back to the gym and refill that needle quick before you deflate. Note: The guy on the rights face looks like it’s about to explode. It’s about 3 times larger than the average mans head. Check his face for needle marks! Beetlejuice boy might have a cure for his lack of head size.

Meet “Burnt Boy”

Buddy – You Look Like a Pile Of Fucking Shit. Get your head out of your boyfriends ass and look in the mirror at least once a day. You will see you are brown and not naturally or in a healthy way. One word: Cancer. Look it up and find out all about Skin Cancer. Enough Of This Clown – I really can’t look at this jaw dropping pathetic pic. FRIENDS – tell your buddies when they resemble strange brown creatures.

Meet “Beeletjuice Boy”

Wow girls – you could go for a ride with Beetlejuice boy in his “Cool Ride.” Hopefully it’s tinted so you can’t be seen riding with this Douche. This boys rehab should be alienation from New Jersey. Guido Rule # 31 applies hard for this guy.

If this kid went bald his head would be about the size of my palm. Strategic Spikes to make his undersized head and brain appear slightly larger. It just ain’t working enough tough guy.

This guys head is about as thick as that Bottle Of Grey Goose. I think I need a head by head comparison with him and Beetlejuice. His new name: He has been reborn as “Beetlejuice Boy”

This guy needs to go back to Guatemala or wherever the hell he’s from. Definitely not pulling off Italian. Wow is he gay.

Once again boys and girls – our favorite freak – Meet The One And Only “Lobster Shanty Man”

This Guy is a bonified Fucking Freak and I hope he see’s himself right on this page. Possibly 20 and over aged to be looking every bit of 40 or possibly 35 and pretending to be in his 20′s. Regardless – a despicable specimen of a juice monkey to the fullest possible extent.

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The Tranny Sucky Sucky Long Time Pucker Up Gang

Two Chernobyl Guidos – Meet – Brown & Burnt

Clearly One Of The Ugliest Men Alive – I wouldn’t be smiling either

Staying A Little Too Close To The Pig Roast Can Turn You Into This

12 Inch Biceps + Bronzer = This Creature

How to build a Guido Tutorial

Just follow these simple steps.

Lobster Shanty Guido – Somebody Stick this guy in a Deep Freezer for a few weeks. My shit is more appealing than this guys face.

Guido of the year & Proud Recipient Lee Hottie – Went from Freckled Face Nerd to Bronzer Enthusiast Fist Pumper. This kid is probably walking around in drag at this point. Just a little bit Overexposed on the net. Your a Tool Bag buddy!

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Newly Updated Clown Pics